The Be a Dad Project: Year in Review


I have been a dad now for a year. It has been a big year.

  • 2 Countries
  • 8 states
  • Rolling, crawling, walking, screaming
  • And major changes to our family

To arm Rockford for life I have endeavored to instill 3 basic virtues:

  1. Explore
  2. Share
  3. Don’t slap the dog

When I started this whole “let’s have a baby” journey my friend Eric told me: “All you can do is love them and feed them.” In my experience I can’t argue against that point. However, I do know that Rose doesn’t really like the phrase (b/c it isn’t about food), so I will reword it.

All you can do is love them for who they are, and help them become who they want to be.

My son wants to chase the dogs. Clearly I can help him get there, but there is very little I can do to change his state. I can encourage him to walk instead of crawl, I can demonstrate how to chase the dogs (and when to leave them alone), but I can’t magically make him balance well enough to run.

Loving my son, in part, means accepting that with each new skill he gets I need to pay more attention to him and let him show me what is next on the agenda. Right now he is pre-talking and getting used to walking and holding at the same time. As a baby he is changing quickly, which means both the bad and good events each day are rarely repeated. But, soon he will have some actual proclivities and broader interests.

Right now my goal for loving him is to accept what he gives me (food, sticks, rocks, cute moments). My goal for helping him become someone cool is to introduce him to lots of people and places.

The Road Plan For Year Two:

  1. Listen to what Rock tells me.
  2. Continue to teach him Sign Language.
  3. Never tell Rock who he is
  4. Ask who he wants to be.

4 thoughts on “The Be a Dad Project: Year in Review”

    1. I know, Eric! Which is part of why I like the greater clarity; I think there are plenty of people for whom “love them and feed them” really does just mean “put food into their bodies,” and that’s not us. (And I know it’s not you, either!)

  1. Happy birthday to Rockford, his mom and his dad. It’s been a very eventful year for all… with many more to come.

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