Making the Difficult Decisions With Friends

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In my mind there is one really standout moment where I had to make a very difficult choice about how to support one of my friends. I had to decide which of two bad decisions was most supportive of what … Continued

Breaking Up

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Parenting is, without a doubt, one of the most important ways that we conceptualize being a lover. Carlos has shared a lot with the blog about what being a father means to him. I haven’t been sharing my thoughts on … Continued

Doing It Wrong

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I spend a lot of time here thinking and talking about how to do better in relationships, but the truth is that I am having a hard time living my words. I have a lot of fear, and a great … Continued

Asking For What You Want in a Relationship

As promised in the comments of Who Gets to Choose: the story of the time I said no to a break-up. Long ago when I was a different man–not entirely, but quite a bit–I was date a enchanting, vivacious woman … Continued

It’s A Dog’s Life

Our beloved, silly dog is having a hard time. She is happiest when there are multiple people who love her, and when she has a somewhat predictable lifestyle. She’s a creature of habit, with high social needs. Even on her … Continued

Process of Elimination – West Virginia

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This weekend, I discovered, definitively, one place that I do not want to live. Not the kind of driven aversion that I feel toward ever living in Arizona again (sorry, guys), but a different feeling of certainty. I do not want … Continued

Van full of chaos

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I thought that living in a van would force me to live in a more organized fashion. I thought that having only 72 square feet would make me place a higher priority on “a place for everything, everything in its … Continued

Who Gets To Choose?

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It takes two people to have a relationship. In what seems like an ideal situation, those people work together to create the terms on which they interact, and to define how their relationship works. In reality, though, that’s almost never … Continued

We Were Here: Ypsilanti, MI

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We’ve been pushing east for weeks and weeks, with the goal of making it to Washington, DC for our friend’s wedding. Some days we drive until we’re exhausted, and sleep wherever the road is welcoming. Other days, the road is … Continued

Someone’s In The Kitchen

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My kitchen is 16 inches by 36 inches, made up of a single-basin sink and a two-burner propane stove. I have two pans (I mistakenly left my third pan in Portland, d’oh), four coffee mugs, four bowls, a french press, … Continued