Being A Lover

There must be fifty ways to leave your lover..
A short sampling of ways to leave your be a lover:

You just slip out the back, Jack
(No need to make a scene – being a lover is not always about you.)

Make a new plan, Stan
(Be flexible! Change is constant, be ready for it.)

You don’t need to be coy, Roy
(Say what you mean. It’s easier on everyone.)

Just listen to me
(Be a learner! Take instruction.)

Hop on the bus, Gus
(Say yes to things! Also, go places!)

You don’t need to discuss much
(This may or may not be true, actually. Communication is important.)

Just drop off the key, Lee
(Know when to let go. Let someone else drive.)

And get yourself free
(Love shouldn’t be a cage. Practice nonattachment!)

You’ll notice, none of these ways have anything to do with makin’ love, as people’s parents say (do they even still say that?). For us here at Grumpy Pie (that is, Carlos and Rose), being a lover is not (only) about sex or romance. It’s about investing time and energy into the things that matter to us. Being a (classical) lover is about investing that time & energy into a romantic and/or sexual partner. Being a parent is also a way to be a lover: you give your kid time and energy and attention and thought. We give ours kitchen tools to play with and raspberries on his fat belly; maybe you give yours music lessons or tickle attacks. We think being a friend should get the same kind of attention. We chose our friends for many of the same reasons that we chose our paramours, although not by exactly the same criteria.

We believe there are as many ways to be a lover as there are relationships in which to do it. Thank you for supporting our plan to share them with you!

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